“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Psalm 42:5 (NIV)
Inquiring minds want to know.
“Do you want kids?”
Ohhhh man. That question appeared early in our dating. Not by him, but by our peers. And, although we got married in our early 30’s, having children was something we put on the back burner. As time went on, that question changed slightly.
“Do you have kids?”
This one caused my heart to beat out of my chest. Was I suppose to? When I replied “no”, I prayed that would be the end of the conversation. But we all know those well-meaning folks who just need to share their heart: “You’d better hurry up, that ol biological clock is tick tick ticking!” or “What’s the matter? Don’t you like kids???”
For the record, we do. We really truly do.
To have or not to have…children…what a loaded topic, right? As a “have not”, I used to be quite sensitive about it and believe that I have some soul sisters out there who can relate. I want you to know that you’re not alone.
And to let go of the lie that you’re not enough if you are childless.
Don’t waste your worth on the worries of what others think.
God made you one of a kind. You are special, girl! You can make a difference in the life of a child who is not your own, if that’s your passion. One of the greatest joys of my life is being “Aunt Tina” to some of the most awesome young women in the universe.
Dignity disarms our defensiveness almost every time.
So, you don’t have kids? Okay. A simple “no” will suffice. You don’t have to elaborate on it or feel bad about it. Remember, people mean no harm. Embrace the fact that they care about your life and always respond in love.
Loving others shifts our focus in a beautiful direction.
Life doesn’t come with a handbook, but love is always a good choice. Love your God. Love your neighbor. Repeat.
Dear one, this is more than a childless story. It’s about living life free from comparison knowing we are loved and always enough in the eyes of our Heavenly Father. May we put our hands in His and believe. XO
Spread your joy,